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It's a struggle with where I find my Lucid. 
Lucid meaning

comprehensibly, linearly narrative / dreamily luminous often to the point of being insensible

obviously.
Each time I share photographs here, I first

invert / invest / devest / suspend / divert / demand / command

them with my personal emotional context,
to the point of a fully blown balloon that

will / may / may not / won't

pop. 
With that noise we can only describe as 

pop + hand signals + horror trauma magic look in the eyes.
And then with my best 

remember-the-page-numbers rationale / peak-around-the-corner-first intuition 

choose the photograph that seems to have the most ability to expose itself,
the most willingness to be

see-through as sixty-degree bathwater / opaque as Formica kitchen table.

The most lucid. 
The most yes, not now.

The most disappearing observing somnambulatory 
yes not now.


It's part of what I like about being on the receiving end of corporeal punishment.
The difference between the tool and use of the tool become
 not thought about in the slightest.

I don't even know if I'm referring to

the tool / the you / the her / the him / the me / the them / the day / the where / the reason / the unreason.

As soon as I share the photographs here
they withdraw from visibility.
Then they become 

not as much mine / more mine

because they are also yours, disappearing.
It is only erasing. Objects as erasers.

I as erasers.


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